These are new photos of Lindsay Lohan entering (or leaving?) a Santa Monica courthouse on Tuesday. She didn’t make any public outings since Friday night, when she (and the paparazzi) went out to see a movie. It’s my hope that she realized how bad that whole “clipping a baby” story was and decided to go easy on the public crackhead drama for a few days. But she needs her public, and she needs to adhere to the terms of her parole/probation, thus, this outing. Even though her eyes are covered in these photos, I have to say, she’s looking especially crackheaded. I just looked up the weather in LA – solid 70s all week, correct? And Lindsay is bundled up like it’s hard autumn.
I was surprised last week that Lindsay didn’t make it to any of the tabloid covers – allegedly, she’s already sold her Crack Diary to one of the tabloids, and the print interviews are going to be paying a lot. But according to TMZ, Lindsay’s first television interview post-jail is still up in the air. TMZ claims that the Today Show is pushing very hard to be the first, but that Dina says “no final decision has been made.” Considering Dina’s interview with Matt Lauer last month was a f-cking disaster, methinks Dina is pushing for Good Morning America…?
Now, I wanted to talk about Lindsay’s Vanity Fair cover story. We already previewed the interview, in which VF released some choice quotes/denial spiral from Camp Crackhead. But my VF came yesterday, and I poured through the whole thing, absolutely fascinated. At times, the writer/interviewer Nancy Jo Sales was truly sympathetic towards Lindsay, making such an interesting argument for Lindsay-as-victim that I actually felt a twinge of sympathy. However, Nancy Jo Sales also detailed – exhaustively – all of Lindsay’s lies and obfuscations and standard bullsh-t. The VF piece is definitely worth a read, although the picture drawn of Lindsay is complicated: in part, she IS a victim, a kid that was forced to grow up too fast, a kid who had horrible parents that did considerable damage. On the other side, she’s an entitled a–hole, a compulsive liar, a user, an abuser, and a self-pitying, delusional, narcissistic disaster. I wanted to pull some of what I thought were the most interesting parts:
**How Nancy Jo Sales describes Lindsay: “She looked fatigued and drawn, and maybe a little scared… she was very thin… It looked like she had had something done to her lips, which appeared puffy and swollen. Her legs were spray tanned an unnatural sienna… Lindsay looked a little raw. And yet shining through her worry and stress and whatever else was currently affecting her mood was her all-American beauty, finer and more delicate in person than in pictures. She still looked like a movie star. She smelled of cigarettes and exotic perfume.”
**Lindsay on her second D.U.I. arrest in 2007, when she hijacked a car to get to her ex-assistant’s mother, Michelle Peck: “The second DUI was such a sh-t show. It was such a ridiculous situation, with the car and Michelle Peck. Like, I wanted to talk to her on a sober level and I would confide in her.” I think “on a sober level” is my new favorite phrase.
**Lindsay on the rumors that her maybe/probably dalliance with Dominic Cooper in Cannes was the reason for his split with Amanda Seyfried: “Oh, I’ve been with everyone, according to what people have said. Who has enough time in the day? It’s not true, I have morals.” Note: most sources who were in Cannes claim that Lindsay and Dominic did hook up, and quite publicly too.
**Lindsay on her SCRAM bracelet going off at an MTV Movie Awards after-party: She denied that she’d been drinking, insisting that the monitoring device had malfunctioned. “I even said to my attorney, ‘Can I take a lie-detector test?’” Nancy Jo Sales puts this little gem after an exhaustive list of all of Lindsay’s crack-lies over the years.
**Lindsay on how all of this stuff is just her “college” experience: “These were my college years. But they were in the public eye. I was irresponsible. I was experimenting. I was doing certain things that people do 10 times more of when they’re in college. And I’m not making excuses…” Except that college (for the majority of people) doesn’t involve SEVEN YEARS of crack shenanigans in which we’re in and out of rehab four times and busted for multiple DUIs and sentenced to jail.
**Lindsay on getting called out by the CEO of Morgan Creek, who was producing Lindsay’s film (costarring Jane Fonda), Georgia Rule: “That whole situation was so ridiculous. It could have just been a private letter or a private sit-down. It ruined the sales at the box office. Why would you ever harm your own film like that?” NO, crackhead, why would YOU ever harm your film like that?
**Nancy Jo Sales quotes from several unnamed sources throughout the piece – noting at one point that no one wants to go on the record about Lindsay because she’s “Hollywood kryptonite – no one wants their name mentioned with hers”. These sources go on and on about how in the early days of Lindsay’s fame, when she was 16, 17 years old, that she had absolutely no one guiding her, no one giving her structure, no one helping her without an agenda. The unspoken here is “Dina” or “Mother Crackhead” if you will. On the subject of Dina, Lindsay defends her mom, saying that the accusations that Dina has harmed her (or her career) is just wrong: “That sickens me, it’s just disgusting… because my mom is amazing.” Also: Nancy Jo Sales insinuates that Dina is still taking her 15% “manager’s cut” out of everything that Lindsay does.
**When Sales goes into The Descent of The Blohan, she pulls quotes heavily from the unnamed sources. One source claims: “Lindsay was on the A-List and it’s like she was fighting to be on the D-List.” Another says: “It’s ironic that Lindsay was in Mean Girls, because that’s exactly what it was like: Mean Girls with coke and paparazzi.” Also, a reoccurring theme: Lindsay’s paranoia.
**All of Lindsay’s problems have to do with her daddy: “He’s put myself and my mother and my mom’s parents through so much hell. From the death threats to throwing shoes at my grandfather’s head and giving him a concussion to threatening to kill my mother in front of my little brother Dakota. I grew up really fast just because of the situations I was subjected to because of my father. My mom would try to shield me from that as much as possible, but I chose to get in the middle of my parents my entire life… I feel sorry for him. Obviously, it shows a far cry for attention in so many ways. He’s not happy with himself. Therefore, he has to project it onto others.” Those last two sentences are so… ugh. Lindsay, heal thyself.
**Sad story: A successful young producer said that he was having dinner recently at the Chateau Marmont, along with a famous writer and an Oscar-winning director, when Lindsay appeared out of nowhere and plopped down in an empty chair at their table. “She was networking,” he said. “It seemed like an act of desperation. None of us knew her.”
**Remember Lindsay’s disastrous turn as “creative director” for Ungaro last year? She put heart-shaped pasties on the models and showed up to the show coked out of her skull. Nancy Jo Sales’ sources say that Lohan got a substantial check to leave Ungaro and never look back: someone claims Lindsay got a 500,000 Euro check to walk away (roughly $650,000).
**More about how Lindsay hustles: paparazzi offer her $10,000 to pose for candid photos. One says, “If I called her up right now and said ‘I’ll give you $10,000’ she’d come right down.” Also: sources claim that Lindsay’s video interviews for Hollywood TV are paid setups too.
And then, at the end of the interview, one of Lindsay’s weave pieces falls out in front of Nancy Jo Sales. Ridiculous.
Lindsay Lohan on Sept. 7, 2010. Credit: WENN.
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